Finding Myself Again

Hope you’ve all had a good day! So far my illness seems to be fading and I’ve just been doing some work before I’m a Celebrity starts (it keeps me distracted okay). I’ve had a lot of reflection time this week because of my hours which I haven’t had much before, mainly concerning my autism diagnosis.

In all honesty it is still very overwhelming that other people literally think and act differently to me, that people don’t have to overthink interactions as much. I imagine the amount of time I could save if I was neurotypical, then the ‘what ifs’ come in. What if I was ‘normal’? Would I have been bullied and made fun of as much? Would I have hated school as much as I did? I can’t help it. It’s like rediscovering a part of me that has always been visible.

One thing that autism makes me is extremely determined and headstrong to the point of extreme competition. This is something that I don’t think can ever really be helped which is a hard concept. If I love something and have someone better than me then I’m automatically pathetic, which is usually the case in drama. Perhaps maybe you yourself can relate or someone you know is like me.

I guess this blog is not only trying to show how you can go through with what you love with anxiety, but also autism awareness and me recording my findings on myself again. It’s all very confusing, but hopefully will clear up soon.

Go pet a dog today,

Gabby

Here is my dog Charlie. One thing people on the spectrum can usually relate to is a love and understanding of dogs. I’m so glad to have this mutt.